


Sam DiNozzo or Tony Wilson?

by hellbells



Series: Expanded Tales of TLBB: Big Heroes [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, NCIS
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Romance, Woke Up In Vegas
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:02:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23499472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellbells/pseuds/hellbells
Summary: Tony goes to Vegas on vacation to relax but comes back with a husband ... That is not a punchline to a joke.They may have got the major milestones of a relationship in the wrong order but it may be the worst thing to ever happen to Hydra and one, Nicholas Fury.
Relationships: Anthony DiNozzo/Sam Wilson
Series: Expanded Tales of TLBB: Big Heroes [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1690885
Comments: 549
Kudos: 869





	1. Cliches and Choices

**Author's Note:**

> So this is going to be the expanded story of Tony and Sam Wilson encompassing the elements from the shorts but lots of new material too ... I hope. 
> 
> This is aiming to be lighter than some fics and a welcome distraction from my lockdown ... I hope you enjoy it as much as I am writing it but as such won't likely be beta'd. 
> 
> Stay safe everyone - hellbells

**Chapter One: Cliche and choices**

Tony woke up with a mouth as dry as the Sahara but, thankfully, no pounding head. Well, he would have been disappointed with himself if he had woken up with a headache. He hadn’t had one of those since his days in the frat house. 

His room was too damn bright, though for before caffeine. He wasn't alone in his bed but he was too distracted by the feeling of jewellery on his finger. He slowly brought his finger up to his eye line and his worst suspicions were confirmed with the glint of gold on his finger. Huh. That had not been there the night before. Then again, neither had the hot guy who was sharing his bed. “Wow."

The man groaned. “How can you be that loud after last night?" 

Tony smirked because even as his mind tried to turnover exactly what had happened the night before, he seemed to remember that they were both loud at different times for totally awesome reasons. He felt a tired ache in his muscles for pleasant reasons and not just trying to breathe. 

Wait, his mind went back to the ring and sure enough - there it was. Gold on his fourth finger. He wasn’t married before last night but this was Vegas. God, what a cliche, he could just imagine Kate harping on at him for his recklessness. 

“You turning into a nag this soon?” Tony had no idea how he could find this amusing - he was guessing it may have something to do with his recent brush with death. 

The man opened just one eye, he was clearly not a morning person. “Nag? ...” But the voice trailed off, catching the matching ring on his own finger. He slid a look at his bed partner and at least his drunk ass had good taste.

Tony started to sit up in bed, it seemed futile to protect modesty considering the muscles in his body that ached. “Damn, I don’t even know my last name.”

The amusement and ridiculous factor of the whole thing wasn’t lost on him. His bed partner sat up, “Well I am Sam Wilson. I’m ex-military and just back home.”

Tony shook the proffered hand, which was a little odd considering they were naked in bed. “Very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo. NCIS.”

Tony could guess he was military from so many of his mannerisms and he vaguely remembered a conversation last night in between all the flirting, drinking and sex. “Nice. So does that make me Tony Wilson or are you Sam DiNozzo?” 

Sam snickered. “I have no idea. Nice to meet you, hubby.” They hadn’t let go of each other’s hands and the rings clanging made this more real somehow.”

Tony grinned looking at their joined hands and meant his next words. “Nice to meet you too.”

Sam really should be freaking out more and he was already considering all the scenarios in his head. The main one being the fact Nevada law had changed in a bid to stop drunken weddings in Las Vegas. It was simple - no annulments for a year. “So we’ve jumped like four stages in the relationship process by my count.”

Tony agreed. “You mean dating, moving in and then engagement before the big wedding?” 

Sam had a wry smile. “Well when you know, you know.”

Tony chuckled because he’d at least married someone with a sense of humour. “Yeah, and I will have to disclose the marriage to HR.”

Sam was trying to rack his memory for the law change. “How long? In Nevada I mean.”

“One year, no quickies for us.”

Sam smirked. “You know what I think? We do the other three things and then revisit the conversation in a year’s time.”

Tony nodded as that sounded sensible. After all, he wasn’t the type to cheat. He couldn’t after watching his father destroy so many lives with his unethical habits. “Okay, so since we now remember each other’s name. What are you doing now?”

“I’m going to start at the VA hospital in DC.” Sam answered. He was looking forward to it because he’d been a mess after his partner died and this was a way he could give back to the VA.

Tony found himself feeling relieved because at least his new hubby,  _ and yep - that was still weird,  _ was going to be in the same city as him. “So we’re going to be _localish_ as I work at the Navy Yard.”

Sam shook his head as true reality set in. “My friends are going to give me shit for marrying a navy man.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Not the fact that I am a man?”

Sam shook his head. “Nah, man. They’re not the asshole types. Plus, they would just clap me on the back and say I was batting out of my league.”

Tony’s eyes lingered on Sam’s body. “I would say the same thing. You know what, I can’t believe I am about to say these things but I think we need to dress and talk about our plans moving forward.”

Sam was reluctant but agreed. This bed felt like a safe refuge from the calm he knew he would have to adjust to but oh well, he was alive and that was the best thing about living. You needed to do it. 

~*~ 

If there was one thing that should be a national treasure - it was Denny’s. The restaurant that catered for all your hangover needs. Tony was so glad that he’d picked the Mirage for his stay on the strip.  The plate of food in front of him looked like Nirvana and his new husband seemed to agree.  “So, this is crazy.”   
  
Sam snorted. “Nope, we can say it was a whirlwind holiday romance.”   
  
That offered a modicum of truth and Tony was so glad that he had spent a week this time. “Are you sure this won’t cause you any trouble?”    
  
Sam just gave him a look. “I should be asking the same thing to you. You work with marines and the Navy on a daily basis.”   
  
Tony rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry I can give as good as I get and my Director made sure everyone understood equality.”

Sam wasn’t willing to let this go. “I am going to need more than that.”   
  
Tony huffed but realised that he wasn’t a lone-ranger any longer. “Okay, so three Police academies, Fed training and on the side I like Eskrima. So anyone wants to try and hurt me... they better be prepared for a fight.”

Sam paused as he was about to eat some pancakes and didn’t want to choke. “Okay, that’s hot.”

Tony smirked but said nothing. He knew it was early days but there was one thing he could say about his new husband - he was calm and damn cute. 

_"So let's talk about living arrangements ..."_


	2. Learning to Live Together

**Chapter Two: Learning to Live together**

In reality, the conversation was over before it began. Sam was going to move in with him. He had the bigger townhouse and it offered him a separate bedroom/living space to relax in. They may have had sex but that didn’t mean they were ready to share intimate space all the time. 

“You’re okay with me just moving in?”   
  
Tony smirked. “I would be a shitty husband if I left you alone. Plus, fair warning I work ridiculous hours ... my boss assumes that breaks are for quitters.”   
  
“I knew a few like that in the service,” Sam replied. 

“It might have Gibbs possibly but he was more Iraq than Afghanistan.”

Sam chuckled and started to add a few things around the apartment. He didn’t quite feel comfortable yet to clutter up everything. Tony just glared at him pointedly. “Look, the tv and movies are sacred and my piano is my refuge but the rest of it feel free to play around with it ... If I don’t like it, I will tell you.”

“I can’t decide if you’re amazing or just a little too chill to be real.”  
  
Tony’s smirk was so wide it nearly split his face. “You know it’s all part of my master plan. I will call you on the way home.”

~*~

He’d wondered how to play this but decided to go with a calm approach, knowing it would freak them out even more. He walked in, sipping on his coffee and settled at his desk. He didn’t bother to hide his ring, as Sam didn’t serve to be hidden. He calmly logged in and accessed the monthly reports that he needed to do now he was once more on the clock.

Tim and Kate came in and asked him some snide questions before they'd even sat on their own chairs.   
  
“How was vacation?” Tim asked almost politely.   
  
“You went to Sin City, it must be like heaven, right Tony?” Kate goaded. 

Tony looked up from his reports. “It was a great vacation, thanks for asking McGee. As for details you clearly don’t like me oversharing ... So I won’t say another word about it.”

McGee and Todd shared a look as if to say what was going on. Tony didn’t give them any chance to pick up any clues as he returned to his work. He’d shielded them from Gibbs long enough and they would sink or swim. There was one other thing this vacation had done apart from gaining him a husband - it had helped perspective. He’d changed his behaviour to accommodate the new team members but he was letting himself get lost in the mask - well no more. 

She saw the glint of gold as he typed away at a report and shouted. “You’re married?!?!” Kate exclaimed loudly, half horrified and half-annoyed.

Tony nodded. “Yes, I am.” He carried on typing as the disbelief and shock took a hold of the rest of his team. This might just be the best prank he ever played, and even better - he might just end up happy at the end of it.

“How?” Tim stuttered and utterly confused by how this conversation had flipped on its head.

Tony couldn’t resist the smirk on his face and he had to play mind games. It was one of those things where if the opportunity was offered on a plate, it was rude not to take it. “Well, when you find that special someone who you are willing to make a commitment to ... then you go to someone who is legally able to marry you and you make promises to each other.”

“You’re allergic to commitment,” Kate replied snidely. It was clear she was still recovering from having her worldview challenged. She really did need to work on that if she wanted to survive long-term in this job. 

Tony’s answer was oh so easy, showing her the ring. “The wedding ring on my hand suggests otherwise.”

The silence that fell stayed in their part of the bullpen. Tony made a mental note to be as shocking as possible as he got so much work done in the tense silence. Gibbs appeared half an hour later and immediately spotted the glint of the ring. “Who?”

“My darling, Sammy.” Tony wasn’t normally a fan of diminutives but knew that would let them make the wrong assumption. 

Kate looked like she’d swallowed a wasp but she choked out. “I am happy for you and her.” So she wasn’t dumb enough to be hostile in front of Gibbs.

Tony smiled brightly. “Thanks.” If she hoped he would say more she was disappointed. He went straight back to work and wondered who would be next to say something. 

~*~ 

Morrow appeared at the top of the bullpen. “Agent DiNozzo, a word.”  
  
Tony shot up the stairs, already aware of what the conversation would likely be about but was pleased to have it behind closed doors. 

“Sir?”

Morrow looked up. “Take a seat and I hear congratulations are in order.”  
  
“It was all so sudden but we’re happy.” Tony replied, marvelling at telling a perfect truth with no detail to catch him out. Tony was aware that his Director was under no such allusion about the gender of his spouse. 

“You have not mentioned anything to the team.”  
  
Tony shook his head. “No, Director. Well, I am sure they are all enlightened folk. I would rather not risk considering the stakes.”

“Should the news leak, you need to know that NCIS will stand in support. I won’t tolerate any bigoted nonsense.”  
  
Tony’s smile was true and blinding upon hearing that because he’d worked in precincts where that had been the case. “That is good to hear said out loud. Thank you.”   
  
“You should also know that your personnel file has been declared top-secret.” Morrow declared but not in such a way that he wanted answers. 

“Sorry, it’s what I get for marrying an Air-Force man.”  
  
Morrow snorted. “Get out of here, and solve some cases.”   
  
“Sure thank, and thank you once again.”

~*~  
  
Kate looked at him as if an imperious eyebrow would make him spill all his secrets. “You’re not in trouble are you?”   
  
Tony shook his head. “Nope, having just come back from vacation and all. He just wanted to offer me congratulations on my marriage.”   
  
She flushed. “You haven’t said anything about it.”

Tony twirled on his chair. “You hate when I share details about my life. So I have stopped.”  
  
“But you got married.” She was exasperated. 

“Yes, I was there,” Tony remarked calmly, and he mostly remembered it now. 

“You never even gave a hint that you were monogamously dating.” She looked vexed by the whole thing. 

Tony was so amused he couldn’t quite put it into words. “You might not get this .... but I have made enemies working so long in law. So when you want to protect someone you care about ... you hide them.”  
  
“Enemies?”   
  
Tony just looked towards Gibbs as if to say how has she survived? Gibbs glared back at him but Tony wasn’t going to back down. “Yes, because not all problems turn to pixie-dust when I look at them and the bad guys I have put away have families who would quite like to see six-feet under.”   
  
Kate blushed blood red, hating the way he’d twisted the words to make sound stupid. “There is no reason to be rude.”   
  
“Not rude, one of my jobs is to see you survive. If that means a wake-up call, so be it.”   
  
“I see being married hasn’t improved your disposition,” McGee remarked pointedly. Tony was almost proud of the snark. 

“I don’t know _McSnarky_. I think I have been pretty polite considering the passive-aggressive posturing from two junior members of the team.”   
  
Gibbs had just sipped his coffee and kept on drinking listening to the back and forth. He had to give Tony credit for keeping his cool. “I like this DiNozzo, he is quiet and completes his paperwork on time.”   
_  
_ _Tony took the silence afterwards as a wedding present._

_~*~_

After the dense duo, Tony was waiting for it and sure enough, Abby bounded her way into the bullpen. 

“We need to go to lunch.”  
  
Tony snorted and played it coy. “And why do I want to do that exactly Abs?”

“You went to Vegas. You need to tell me all about sin city. _Purlease_ , I haven’t had a vacation forever. So I need to live vicariously through you.”

Tony was under no illusion as to what prompted it but he could get out, grab some sun and food and relax for thirty minutes. So Tony looked to Gibbs who nodded. “Come on, Abs. Let’s go.”

They didn’t go anywhere fancy, there was a food cart that had the best coffee and sandwich subs on the Yard. 

Abby didn’t waste any time in getting to the heart of her aggravation. “How could you get married without me?”   
  
Tony hugged her gently, “You know what? It was selfish but I was doing something for me. Do you know it is crazy but I love being married.”

She looked at him, really looked at his dopey expression. “Yeah, I can see that you are all gooey-eyed. What will I tell the twins at the club?”   
  
“That I am off the market.” Tony answered whilst he twisted the ring on his finger. He was going to need to find a work suitable replacement. 

She pouted. “You’re not going to tell anyone about your marriage, are you?” 

Tony grinned cheekily. “Do you know what? I don’t think I will ... I am getting a life out of NCIS and I would recommend it.”  
  
“Okay.” She huffed. “But don’t be all gooey about it.”   
  
Tony smirked. “Abs, the only reason why I would be gooey is to annoy Kate and McGee if they get annoying when pressing for details.”   
  
She had a matching evil grin, she missed this fun side to her friend. It hit her that she hadn’t been a great friend in recent months and would try to do better. “Let me know if you need help.”   
  
Tony was cautious but if he got his little sister back, she might be one of the only ones to be introduced to his husband. “I’ll remember that.”

~*~  
  
Tony dropped on his couch, next to his husband, who was watching some TV. It was late but he was glad to be home. Tony turned towards his husband and asked. “So how was your day, dear?”   
  
Sam snorted because he could have gone with the sarcastic answer. “Well, I got set up at the VA hospital, updated my records. Oh, and I was asked how I could possibly have chosen to marry a Navy man.”   
  
Tony frowned. “I’m a civilian.”   
  
Sam just gave him a look as if to say he wasn’t fooled. To be fair, Tony had shared some light details of cases like the time he had to go undercover as a marine. “If you can go into a marine unit for two weeks then you’re hardly a marine.”   
  
“I like to be underestimated. You know my boss wanted to say congratulations. He’s promised full support for when the news truly breaks.”

Sam was feeling brave and snuggled in closer, wanting the warmth. That was his excuse anyway and he was sticking to it. “Why is DC so cold?”  
  
“Well, we’re not in Afghanistan.” Tony observed but he slung his arm around Sam. 

Sam whispered. “I’m glad to be here.”

It was a truth, something they promised each other. Tony didn’t know how comforting it would be to know that there was someone waiting for him at home. “You know what? I’m glad too.”

There was no more talking that evening, the couple were glad to pass the time cuddling on the couch watching Die Hard. 

~*~

Tim was down in Abby’s lab. “So did you find out anything?”   
  
Abby swung around on her chair. “Timmy, I am working for results that Gibbs needs. You know better than to bug me now.”   
  
“It’s just I don’t get who would marry Tony of all people.”   
  
Abby snorted. “Really? You have eyes, don’t you? Tony makes straight guys turn heads when he is out on the town. His bed is empty by his choice and then you factor in the rich, and a Federal Agent ... Most would consider him to be a catch.”   
  
Abby didn’t know anyone could literally turn the colour green but McGee right now was close to it. 

“But he is just so Tony.” McGee tried to retort with but it sounded pathetic even to his own ears and that just made him doubly sad. 

Kate and Tim kept trying to find out about Tony’s other half. They had run into too many frustrations. It seemed his personal file had now been locked down and made top-secret. It didn’t matter if they directly asked Tony as they only received non-committal answers that offered no real details. 

Of course, if Tony had his choice, he would not have contracted the _mother-fucking_ plague. 


	3. Mother F-Ing Plague

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony catches the plague, and Sam and Tony catch a clue about their feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This covers the Y-Pestis episode SWAK now with the current world Covid-19 situation if anyone feels this might be difficult I'd skip a minimum of first two scenes.

**Chapter 3: Mother-F’ing Plague**

It had happened so quickly. The powder had blown in his face and he just knew it would be bad. 

“We have to stay positive.”

Tony snorted at Kate's naivety. “Yeah, Sam makes me positive. You’re just a unicorn and I can’t handle this right now.”   
  
She rolled her eyes. “Let’s not borrow trouble.”   
  
Tony snorted because life had taught him that he got nothing else. It was just his luck, he’d found a great man, admittedly by accident and then - this. It was supposed to be their anniversary this weekend, and he had detailed plans, sexy plans. And now, he was going to have to fight whatever this crap turned out to be. 

**Y-Pestis**

~*~

Kate was staying with him but Tony kind of hoped she would disappear as he wanted to wallow in misery. He kept telling her she should go and solve the case. She was firm and resolute though, that she was staying. She played it off with humour. “You just don’t want me to see your wife.”

Tony would have smirked but it wouldn’t have been seen behind his mask. He did manage to rasp out, “He isn’t wifey material.”

She figured it must be the fever. “What?”   
  
Tony didn’t answer but rather Sam did, dressed in no safety gear. “No. I am not and how dare you think about making me a widow.” He declared with hands-on-hips like it wasn’t an option to do anything else but survive. "You will not die on me."

Tony finally showed his emotions. “I’m scared.”   
  
Sam shook his head. “Nah, you will fight for me ... We’re meant to celebrate our anniversary next week. It is no longer active in your system, and you can’t infect others so now you just have to fight.” 

The unspoken part was they agreed that after a year they would revisit their marriage. Tony knew what might have started as a drunken mistake was rapidly turning into the best thing that had ever happened to him. 

If Kate had any doubts about the marriage, the matching ring was a dead giveaway. She found herself saying stupidly, “So, you are not what I expected.”

Sam smirked and showed how he could wind people up with the best of them. “Why? Because I’m Air-Force?”

She flushed and knew she had to be careful of her word. “No. But I deserved that, I guess.”

He quirked an eyebrow as if to say. _Do you_ _ think? _

Tony weakly raised his hands. “Don’t worry, won’t die.”

“I know because I can’t use my wings to save you.” He said and smiled. It was clear that the couple had an in-joke they hadn’t shared. 

Kate was clearly surplus to requirements and chose to leave. “Oh, I will go and see how Gibbs is doing tracking down the perp.”

Sam had taken the chair next to his bed, showing he was prepared to stay for the long haul. “You do that.”

_ ~*~ _

It was later that evening and Kate could no longer keep her newfound information to herself. McGee was listening with confusion. “Tony is gay?”    
  
Abby smacked him. “He’s in the ICU and all you can focus on is that Tony married a dude?”    
  
“He kept teasing me about being gay last year!” McGee tried to defend himself and he knew it sounded stupid even to his own ears. 

Abby was in a mood. “Maybe he was trying to give you a hint?”   
  
Kate scolded her. “Abby, you can’t say that.”   
  
She scoffed at both of them. “Yeah I can, that is what is great about being an independent, educated adult. We form opinions and hypotheses.”

Kate frowned because she was sure Abby was judging her considering her lifestyle choices. “Look, I can admit I was surprised when he walked in. He has already given me crap over it. Well, not much but that was because he was worried about Tony.”

Abby smirked. “Did he feed you the line about being Air-Force?”   
  
Kate caught on first. “You knew?”    
  
Abby snorted because, wow, hadn’t she just implied it. “Yeah, Tony is the better cook but Sam is the better at doing sane workouts.”

“You’ve actually talked to them?” Kate asked shrill-like in shock. She couldn't believe Abby hadn't said anything to them.    
  
Abby rolled her eyes. “You forget sometimes that Tony and I have been here a lot longer than you.”

There was another rebuke there but Abby wasn’t even a bit sorry. If anything she was guessing she might have been too subtle but she had no choice. 

~*~   
  


Tony woke up and for once, he felt like he was going to be okay. He could see Sam sitting curled up asleep on the chair and Tony smiled softly. 

“He’s been here from the get-go. He left to change and food, and that was it.”

Tony flushed. “He is a good man boss.”   
  
“Well, the vows say for better or worse.” 

Tony smiled softly because he was getting the idea - that they really were going to last long term. “Yeah, and if this doesn’t scare him nothing will.”   
  
“I saw your boy’s tats ... He can handle a fair bit.” Gibbs pointed out bemused. 

Tony wanted to shrug but right now that was going to take more energy than he could manage. “Yeah but he doesn’t have to do it alone anymore.”   
  
“And that is what a marriage should be,” Gibbs promised him. “You could have said.”   
  
Tony sighed. “I could but he was mine.”   
  
“And you wanted to keep that for yourself.” Gibbs finished off, knowing that every word Tony uttered right now could exhaust his body. 

“Yeah, I love him boss,” Tony admitted. He wasn’t scared to say it. In fact, he was just annoyed that it took him this long to really say the words. 

What he didn’t know was Sam had heard every word.

~*~   
  
In less time than strictly recommended - Tony was checking out of the hospital. He’d had one confession where he said to Sam he needed not to see Blue-Lights if he was going to actually sleep. It seemed to be enough as Sam had struck a deal with a nurse at the VA to check Tony over once a day.

Tony would have crawled into the house but was grateful for the shoulder of his husband. “So Happy Anniversary babe.”   
  
Sam snorted. “I got the best anniversary present, your dumbass alive and still breathing.”   
  
Tony pouted as he slumped onto their couch. He’d used his energy for the day for the small trip from the car to the couch. He was now going to snuggle with Sam and hibernate for as long as he could manage it. 

“You’re so soft right now.” Sam observed with a grin.   
  
Tony shrugged. “Don’t care, I've been wanting to do this without wires from the beginning of my stay.”   
  
Sam didn’t disagree and pulled him closer and now they were in the refuge of their place. “You scared the crap out of me.”

“I scared me too, but you said I couldn’t die so I didn’t.”

Sam kissed his forehead just glad that he would still get the chance to - and the whole hospital affair put his whole relationship in perspective. “You know I need to say it now. I don’t want a divorce, not now, not ever.”

Tony was falling asleep but seemed to be doing his best impression of a starfish. “Good, love you too. Told Gibbs, when he was scowly. Wanted it to be you first.”   
  
Sam didn’t reply as Tony was asleep getting some much-needed rest but he did whisper. “I know.”   
_  
He wondered if their life would calm down - he doubted it, not when he brings home a certain stray.  _


	4. Eagle Catches the Hare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Ari and Ziva 'try' to make an appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We start to see major Canon DiVergence for MCU from Winter Soldier and also, from NCIS Season 3 beginning.

**Chapter 4: Eagle catches the hare**

Tony never made a big deal of it but he had favours he could call in. He cashed a few in because after Sam left active service they retired his wings that he used for Para-rescue. It turns out that they couldn’t get other pilots to work so well with the equipment. 

Tony figured then that the choice should remain with Sam. They could still be useful if needed, and he didn’t trust others not to abuse the technology. It might be later than the anniversary present it was intended to be - but it still counted. 

Sam opened the package and gasped. “How?”   
  
Tony shrugged. “People owe me favours, I cashed a few in.”   
  
Sam was a loss for words. “Thank you.”   
  
“You got out for a reason but the choice is now yours,” Tony promised. 

Sam hugged him and tried to surreptitiously wipe his eyes. He kissed Tony's cheek but never quite managed to let go of the wings. “Thanks, babe. I gotta go to work now, are you sure you’re okay to go back.”   
  
Tony rolled his eyes. “Yeah. I am. I need to shake off this energy.”

Sam had challenged him the night before to show that he was ready to go back to work. He had blown his mind all night long. 

“Okay, slugger. Just try and come back in one piece this time.”

Tony would have objected but had just come back from a bout of Y-Pestis. He figured he’d let his husband win this round. 

~*~

Day one and Tony was standing there as he had spotted the fact  _ McStupid _ had triggered a pressure bomb. McGee was just lucky that he'd stopped him before he’d turn the lock on the trunk too far.

“What do I do?”    
  
Tony gradually took over holding the key to ensure none of them blew up. “You run up that hill as fast as you can.”   
  
Kate was worried. “You can’t keep it stable for too long.”   
  
Tony growled. “I am not going to but you are going to follow my goddamn orders and get up the hill and I will be right behind you. NOW GO!”   
  
Tony looked at the trunk of the car, and he was remembering the conversation he had with Sam this morning. He promised his husband that he would come home in the same shape - he _really_ hoped that this bomb didn’t make him a liar. 

He took a moment to centre his breathing and get as much oxygen into his lungs. This wasn’t going to be something he could replay. He used his gum to wedge around the lock to give him a precious for more seconds. 

He let go and raced straight up the hill, he heard the boom and flung himself to the ground. He was almost at the crest of the hill, not bad considering he’d had the plague. He knew he would have made it over the hill if this had been a month ago but there was no point in focussing on the past. 

Kate’s cry of, “Tony!” He could hear so the blast hadn't damaged his hearing. 

“Ow.”   
  
“You’re supposed to be taking it easy.” She reminded him. 

“What was I supposed to do? Let _McSlow_ get blown up.”   
  
McGee was pale looking at the remnants of the car, “I could have, that could have.”   
  
Tony stood up with the help of Kate and he was okay. “Yeah, you could have ... Don’t ever assume a scene is safe, probie. I might not be here to bail out your ass.”

~*~

Tony had taken one look at their ‘liaison’ and chose to take lunch with Abby. The woman reeked of deception and Tony wanted to warn Abby to keep her eyes open. Plus, if she chose to be extra sneaky and keep an eye on their area of the bullpen - then it was just happenstance.

“Abs it time I treat you to dinner.”   
  
She huffed. “Gibbs is extra grouchy today!”   
  
Tony rolled his eyes because one day Gibbs would learn that sometimes you caught more flies with honey than vinegar. He slung an arm around her shoulders. “Come on, unless you tell me any of your instruments are due to speak to you in the next half an hour. I can treat you to lunch and a caf-pow to fortify your soul.”   
  
She giggled. “Lead on good Sir.”

The pair had chosen to stay on the grounds of the Yard with the case so hot.    
  
“I don’t get it. Why is he extra Gibbs like?” Abby asked.    
  
“This case is Ari Haswari. The man came into our backyard, hurt our people and ran away with a smirk on his face.” Tony explained. He’d been pissed about the whole affair and hadn’t been allowed to rip into Kate the way he wanted. 

Abby understood. “Ah, crap. It doesn’t help that his skanky sister is creeping around.”   
  
Tony kind of loved Abby’s inability to warm to new people right now. “You keep thinking that, I don’t trust her agenda or the new madam’s one either. 

Abby bit her lip. “Have you seen the way she looks at Gibbs?”    
  
Tony snorted. “It was the first thing I noticed, I think she’s the reason for rule 12. She shouldn’t be letting Mossad anywhere near the MCRT Abby. I need you to document any time Officer David asks for any odd information.”   
  
“You think she is spying?”    
  
Tony smirked because that was the best option in his mind. “I would be surprised if they didn’t want to take advantage.”

Abby had a bright idea. “Can I ban her saying she is not a member of NCIS, therefore, can’t enter the labs without an accompanying agent?” 

Tony relaxed a little hearing that idea, “Yeah, Abs that is kind of perfect actually.”   
  
“You’re going to keep an eye on Gibb’s ass?” 

Tony smiled at the question because he knew how important Gibbs was to Abby. He was practically a second father. “Yeah, you know I always watch bossman’s ass.”

What he hadn’t said is he considered it his job to watch both his literal and metaphorical ass. He knew they planned to check out a building and he had a bad feeling about this. It seemed like Ari had decided to play a game of cat and mouse against Gibbs and damn the people who got in the way. 

He texted Sam - He was going to have to ask his husband to strap on his wings after all. 

~*~

Kate had been a Secret Service agent and still had not been able to see the danger of Gibbs’ hunt. It annoyed the hell out of her that she hadn’t recognised the kill zone for what it was until the red dot landed on her chest. 

She sighed and pulled Gibbs down knowing if the shot was taken she would have little chance at avoiding it - only the bullet never came. 

Gibbs helped pull her up and he knew that they’d escaped a bullet (literally in their case). 

“How are we not dead?” She had to ask, voice still shaking as her body tried to handle the adrenaline overload. 

Gibbs could only give one answer. “A sniper doesn’t take a shot for only one reason.”

The door to the roof once more kicked in to see Tony’s husband dragging a cuffed Ari Haswari. “My husband asked me for a favour.”

Gibbs frowned because something wasn't adding up here. He knew Wilson had gotten across from the perch Ari would have been in, to their position way too quickly. He couldn’t see how Wilson had got to them but right right now, he wasn’t willing to kick a gift horse in the mouth. “Nice timing.”

“I know,” Sam replied cockily and said nothing else. He wasn’t stupid, it was when people started to talk that they gave away clues. The wings he flew with luckily folded away and his backpack offered a tentative cover. So a marine would just assume it held his gear. 

Tony pulled his hubby into a fierce hug as Gibbs had taken over Ari’s custody. “I’m Tony Wilson right now, I think.”

Sam chuckled. “You better believe it but have fun figuring this out. I was never here. I want a dog.”

The MCRT all nodded. They were hardly going to cause trouble for a) a team member’s husband, and b) someone who had just saved Kate’s life. 

Tony couldn’t help call out,  “Thanks, Darlin. I’ll see you at home and we'll talk about a Dog.”

Kate, who now was starting to relax, smiled. “Don’t take this the wrong way but I love your husband and I will give him a puppy for Christmas.”

Tony smirked. “I’ll sort it, Kate. Don’t you worry.”

~*~

Tony was massaging his temples because he was beginning to get a headache. Sheppard had demanded that Gibbs and he come to her office - it was clear she wasn’t happy with them for apprehending Haswari which didn’t make much sense.    
  
“You wouldn’t have just been able to catch Ari.” David was whining but it was close to banshee levels of pitch. 

Gibbs smirked and managed to say with a straight face. “His kill zone was obvious to my team and we had an agent ready to spring the trap.”

She was still way too haughty considering she was on foreign soil. “And who was this Agent? And why is his name not mentioned.”   
  
Tony smiled sweetly. “Top secret and sorry, that means a Mossad Agent, even a liaison officer doesn't get to find out.”   
  
Sheppard interjected. “We’re all friends, here.” Her tone could be described as sweetly acidic and Tony was guessing she wasn’t going to be too happy with him.    
  
Tony shook his head. “Sorry, Madam Director. I cashed in a favour to borrow an Air-Force officer. It was on the understanding that their identity would not be revealed.”   
  
“I don’t like this.”   
  
Tony smiled gently. “That is understandable and you can take up your objection with the Secretary of Defence.”   
  
It wasn’t too obvious who was more in shock at the idea Tony would speak to the SECDEF - David or Shepard. 

Gibbs just rolled his eyes. “I don’t keep DiNozzo around because he is pretty. He has great contacts and he talks to people so I don’t have to either.”

Tony chuckled. “Director Morrow used to give me a Christmas bonus for keeping the complaints below a certain level. I think he was tempted to put it as one of my appraisal targets.”

Shepard flushed because it was obvious there was more than one layer to that comment. She could tell that Gibbs’ protege was going to be just as much of a handful as the man himself. Still, if he had friends in high places she would need to tread carefully. 

~*~

Tony himself was done with the backbiting and the intrigue and just glad to be home. When he saw who was in their house though, all he could say was, 

_ “We talked about a Golden Retriever, not Captain fucking America.”  _


	5. A Matter of Strays

**Chapter Five: A Matter of Strays**

Tony looked at the pouting man and sighed because it was ridiculous for someone that muscled to look that sad and like a kicked puppy. 

The blonde man had been around Stark for long enough that he could roll with poor greetings and stepped forward offering his hand. “I prefer Steve Rogers.”

Tony winced and managed to look contrite. “Of course you do and sorry for being an asshole ... we just closed a long case.” He offered by way of an explanation.

“You’re an agent?” Steve asked, trying to deflect from himself. 

Tony nodded with a smile and remembered his manners, “Yeah, that’s right. This one’s husband and an NCIS Special Agent, Tony DiNozzo. Nice to meet ya. Please seat down and ignore the sass I give Sam.”

Sam had returned having made a tray of coffee. Steve took his cup and marvelled at the taste of it. It sure tasted a lot better this century.

“So how did you and Sam cross paths?” Tony asked carefully. He wondered if it was happenstance or in a professional capacity. Sam was still working at the VA hospital and Tony imagined that if he was rudely slammed nearly a century into the future - he would have a few issues to work through with a therapist. 

“I kept lapping him around the monument,” Steve said with a smirk. 

And Tony got it, in a hot second. There was a saying like, recognised like and he saw someone who knew how to use a mask to his advantage. “Wow, you must have so much fun trolling everyone.”

Sam was frowning at him, not quite getting what Tony was alluding to. “Did you just call a National Icon a troll?”

Tony shook his head but he was still laughing, as wow, this was just too good. It was also a great way to end what had been a shit show of a day. He was going to have to think carefully about how to deal with Sheppard and Mossad trying to get their claws in his agency. “No, I am saying Steven J Rogers takes great delight in trolling everyone who puts their massive expectations of him being some paragon of virtue that the bloody government has made him out to be.”  
  
Steve grinned. “You know, I don’t get it. You know before I ever joined the army I was a kid in Brooklyn.”

Sam was just sitting there in shock. “Wow.” He’d seen a man who seemed so very lost and he had wanted to be his friend. He suspected that Rogers had very true friends in this world without expectations laid at his feet. What Tony had said though put quite a few things in perspective and he realised he would have to be careful not to fall into the same trap himself, despite his good intentions. 

Tony just snorted. “Oh man, I think you are my second favourite person in this world.”

Steve pouted, giving a hint of his trolling nature. “Only second?”

Tony grinned crookedly, more than equal to this game, and pointed to Sam. “He may not be as fast as you are but he is mine.”

Steve nodded and showed he was pleased by that fact. “You two are quite something and if there is one good thing about the future is that certain attitudes have changed.”

Tony could guess there was more behind that statement than perhaps some might guess. He would let the man tell them in their own time. “Well, Steve you’re welcome to stay for dinner. It’s my night so it will be proper pasta.”

“If you’re sure, that would be real swell.”

He looked bashful about his language but Sam brushed it off. “You can say what you want in this house and anyone who says otherwise can go screw themselves.”

Tony had headed into the kitchen but shouted back. “What hubby said!”

~*~

Tony and Sam got an unexpected but fascinating dinner guest. Steve as they made a point of addressing him was happy to share stories of his past.

“So Bucky rescued my ass, I have always wanted to fight ... Dr Erskine just gave me the body to match my spirit. That is what Bucky always said.”

Tony smiled softly. “I think he would marvel at the fact you’ve managed to pick a fight in a brand new century.” 

“So how have you had help with adjusting to the future?” Sam asked, wanting to see he was being looked after by SHIELD. 

Steve looked shocked by the question. “Help?”

“Yeah, I mean feel free to tell me to shut up but you got frozen for 70 years. It must have been one hell of a rude awakening.” Sam pointed out and he got a sinking feeling that the man had been given no help at all. 

“I didn’t really. Director Fury just gave me a target to fight.” Steve answered honestly. He was stunned to realise he had just idly accepted his lot in life. Bucky if he'd been around would be surprised by his actions, and probably would have _metaphorically_ kicked his ass. 

Tony sucked in a breath because that was just too disturbing and bordering on callous. “Wow. Okay, if you would like we can be guides for 70 years of history that is if you’re willing.”

Steve was hopeful because he desperately wanted to learn about things but couldn’t wrap his head around the new technology without breaking it. “Why would you do that for me? You don’t know me.”

Tony shrugged wanting to downplay the importance. He didn’t want Steve to be grateful, if anything he considered it a civic duty. “Sam brought you home which means you are important to him. Plus, I would be a terrible human if I left you to struggle after all you sacrificed.”

Steve snorted because people kept talking about this massive thing he’d done. He didn’t consider it to be one. In his eyes, it had been his life versus the Western World. “I never considered it a sacrifice you know. It had to be done to end the threat of HYDRA.”

Sam nodded in understanding having a soldier’s mindset himself. “Then know this isn’t a sacrifice for us. Plus, you know we just want to grill you for stories. Our conversations were getting stale before all this you know.”

Steve highly doubted that seeing how at ease, and their natural chemistry. He found he enjoyed their excellent meal; he had not felt like a science experiment. It was the most relaxed he had felt since arriving in the twenty-first century. “It will be nice to know what everyone is talking about.”

Tony grinned manically. “If you’re not on life-saving duty. Let’s start with a Star Wars Marathon this Saturday.” Tony sighed just considering how he was going to handle the fun side of the information dump. “Just wait until after we have caught you up on the movies and pop-culture and you can troll people in a whole new way. 

~*~

Tony had the Avengers Tower in New York but considering there was a lot of business conducted in DC. He built a compound in the capital for when they had to deal with politics. Fury was trying to keep him busy with STRIKE work but Steve had so far managed to resist a lot by staying apart at the compound. 

It was late but his body was still thrumming with energy. When he slipped through the front door and was greeted by a judgemental tone. 

“Where have you been, Spangles?”

Steve wondered when he started feeling like a kid, sneaking home to a disapproving father. “I had dinner with two friends.”  
  
“You have friends, since when?”

Steve didn’t like that tone. “Since I went out to run and spoke to people like a normal person.”  
  
Stark was astounded and obviously shocked. “Who are they? And do SHIELD need to vet them? Or do I need to vet them?”  
  
Steve snorted. “Well, Tony ... one is a counsellor at the VA hospital and his husband is an NCIS Federal Agent. So I would say they’re safe. We’re having a Star Wars Marathon on Saturday, I am looking forward to it.” 

Tony was obviously trying to find the right words - he failed. “They’re not trying to corrupt a national icon are they?”  
  
“Nope, they are both hot though so I would consider it. If they were offering something more than a movie.” Steve informed Stark with a straight face.  
  
Stark was so confused, he hadn’t seen Steve show his sense of humour yet. He wasn’t sure how to handle this version of Captain America. “I think I should say I’m proud. Did you have any other earth-shattering revelations with this couple?”  
  
Steve shook his head. “Nope, I just got fed excellent pasta. I shared some stories growing up and compiled a list of books I want to read to catch up. I am done hiding from this century.” He declared definitively because his new friend, Tony had made him realise that he couldn't hide from the world - it was here.  
  
Stark didn’t know whether to hug this mysterious couple or kidnap them. He found himself patting Steve on the shoulder. “You know JARVIS will help you with the list if you give them to him.”  
  
“I know and I will. Thank you, Tony, for everything, and goodnight.”

Stark waited until Steve was out of the room before asking his favourite person in the whole world. “Jarvis, what can you tell me about the couple who Captain Spangles visited today?”

Stark was trying to judge him on his own merits but it was so hard with how wrapped up in his father's memory. Whatever his personal feelings were, he didn't want the guy taken advantage of by people, he was telling himself it was for PR reasons but it was more. 

~*~

Tony was in work early, the next day, as he had the SFA paperwork to finish off. A looming figure was over him though and a quick glance let him know just who was stopping his paperwork. He found himself asking calmly. “Can I help you, Director Fury?”

“Why were you talking to my asset?” Fury demanded to know. 

Tony snorted, not impressed by the attempted intimidation. He was immune after working for Gibbs for so long. “Your asset has a name, Steve. Plus, it wasn’t my fault you would have to blame my husband. He was the one to drag him home, I just fed him pasta.”

“He comes back to the compound and freaks Tony Stark out and all you did was talk and feed him?” Fury asked bewildered because it had to be more than that, right?

Tony looked up from his screen deciding if Fury was going to be an asshole then he could put up with his sarcasm. “Yep, we treated him like a normal human being but ... because Sam is a counsellor he asked him about his feelings. Sorry but he can’t help it, it’s in the job description.”

Fury glared at him but he found it ridiculous with the whole eye patch - it just ruined the whole thing. “Do you think you’re funny?”

Well, if Tony was fed such a line he was obliged to take it. He knew he probably shouldn’t give in to temptation but it was just too good so with a massive smirk, replied, “I know I am but the last time I checked, I don’t work for SHIELD.”

Fury shook his head in disbelief. “You made Captain America ask for a list of books.”

Tony frowned. “So the man is curious about History ... He figured he should catch up on what he missed so he isn’t ignorant, You can’t fault a man for wanting to be educated.”

Fury’s look implied that he had wanted exactly that and if that was the case then Tony was really glad he interfered. The man smirked at Tony, “I am going to ask Wilson to be the Avenger’s counsellor.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “All those big personalities would need it but they live in New York full-time and we live here.”

“For now.” Fury replied cryptically.

Okay, Tony was done with this whole conversation. “WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?”


	6. How is this My Life?

**Chapter 6: How is this my life?**

Tony didn’t get an answer as Fury smirked and walked off towards the exit. Tony took a deep breath and reminded himself that he had work to do. He would have to figure out Fury’s mind games later, he still needed to sort out dealing with the fallout of the Mossad affair. He just hoped his early phone calls had done the trick. 

That didn’t mean he wasn’t going to warn his husband that he would have Fury incoming. He sent a short and sweet message -  _ Dread Pirate Fury is going to ask you to look after his merry band’s feelings. _

Sam must be on a break as he got a reply in seconds.  **_-For real?_ **

Tony snorted, wondering if he was going to regret getting out of bed this morning. He muttered under his breath. “That is what you get for bringing home a stray.”

He wondered how much of America he would have angered by calling Captain America a dog but it was an accurate description. 

Kate frowned hearing what Tony said having arrived for her own shift. “A stray, did you get Sam his dog?”

Tony snorted knowing that if he even spoke the truth about last night - it wouldn’t be believed. He was okay with that though. “Yeah, he was abandoned and all sad. I ended up giving him some pasta because Sam was all upset.”

Kate smiled and never thought she would say this but even she could eat humble pie about someone who had helped save her life. “You’re a good husband and you know I think Sam is awesome.”

Tony snorted because Kate should be forever grateful to Sam for saving her life by stopping Ari from taking his shot. “Yeah, he is.”

~*~

Gibbs saw SECDEF walk into Shepard’s office with a dark glare on his face. “Is this your doing?”    
  
Tony had an innocent smirk. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, boss.”

Gibbs gave him a look. “My office.” 

Tony was all too happy to have this conversation without anyone listening. "Lead the way." 

Gibbs got in first and as per usual he stopped the lift. “Talk.”   
  
Tony said the first thing that came to his mind. “You know maintenance is this close to banning you from using the lifts.”

“I’m sure they would like to - why did you do it?” Gibbs put the conversation back on track.    
  
Tony snorted in disbelief because he figured the answer should be obvious. “You can’t tell me there is a world you’re happy with Mossad being anywhere near the MCRT.”   
  
“She was going to be the liaison officer!” 

Tony wasn’t having any of it. “Boss, I say this with a hand on my heart. A spy stops being a spy when they’re dead.”   
  
Gibbs sighed because this was going to end Sheppard’s directorship before it even began. “You could have said something.”   
  
Tony was so done with this whole week. “Boss, I am having to deal with regular SFA duties that have piled up during my medical leave. I had Sam bring home the biggest fucking golden retriever wrapped up in a Captain America shell.    
When I came to work this morning, I had a Dread-Pirate knock off demand to know what my intentions were regarding the retriever. Then you get up all in my face for doing my job of watching your six.” 

Gibbs wasn’t quite sure what he could say to that rant. “Do you feel better?”

“Not really, as Sam is heading to New York but whatever happens to the Director ... Is due to her own choices.”

~*~

Tony got a call on his cellphone during his lunch break that he'd been expecting. He had been hiding in Abby’s lab as people tended to avoid it around lunchtime for obvious reasons. “You’re going to give Captain America a Star Wars marathon?”

Tony rolled his eyes and even though he hadn’t met the prison he recognised the voice. “That is the plan but it is at my house and I don’t know if we will fit all the Avengers and sorry to say Hulk definitely won’t fit.”

Stark snorted because the big man barely fit in the compound or tower. “How did you do it?”

Tony could hear exasperation but also a genuine question so this time he gave a straight answer. “We treated him like Steve Rogers.”

Stark sighed. “And none of us did.”

Tony shrugged because he could guess there might be baggage around Captain America and the Starks. He remembered his field trips to the museum and even if half of it would have been true - Stark’s daddy issues were justifiable. “So reach out to him, he wasn’t around for the last seventy years ... He needs help to catch up, Stark he looked pathetically grateful for the offer to help him.”

Stark huffed. “Fury would have done it.”

Tony laughed cynically. “No, he didn’t. He likes his assets strong and dumb. At least that is what I inferred from our conversation this morning where he asked me what my intentions were to Captain America. The only question is, are you going to continue to allow Fury to pull the strings?”

Stark snickered. “Wow, you are as subtle as a sledgehammer.”   
  
“Coming from a man who flies around in red and gold. You have zero room to judge, Stark.” Tony zinged back.   
  
Abby popped back into the lab. “Who are you talking to?”   
  
Tony put a hand to the receiver. “Tony Stark. How was the Caf-Pow hunt?”

She ground to a halt. “You’re talking to Iron man casually in my lab.”   
  
Tony nodded enjoying this more than he should. “Stark, you're on speaker with my favourite goth forensic scientist. You should know Ab’s that Stark is planning to hijack my Star Wars Marathon with Captain America.”

“I am not!”

Tony shook his head. “Look, just look after my husband Stark and you can come to any movie marathon you like.”

“Your husband is an interesting guy, DiNozzo.”

Tony sighed because there was so much he could say here because he did love his husband stupid. “Don’t break him Stark.”

Stark snickered. “Relax, slugger. He is safe on the honour of the Avengers. Although you should know, Spangles said to me last night that he would be so willing to have a threesome with you both.”   
  
It was a good thing that he had not been drinking, or it would have been lost in that moment. Abby was out and out cackling at him, she gasped out. “What would Timmy and Kate say they’ve only just started to believe you’ve settled down?”   
  
Tony shook his head. “Well, they’re stupid, you’d have thought being married a year would give them a clue.”   
  
“I thought you’re supposed to be a crack team of investigators,” Stark asked, reminding the NCIS pair that they were on speaker with a billionaire. 

Tony grinned at Abby, knowing they could answer in oh so many ways. “They see what I want them to see Stark, just like your boy, Steve.”

“Was there a rebuke in that last statement?” Stark asked, mildly affronted. 

Tony knew he needed the Avengers to wake up to their team dynamics before it could become a problem. Steve was seeing Tony as a carbon copy of Howard Stark, and it was clear from the recent actions that Stark was trying to distance himself from weapons. If he was guessing things right, then when Steve tried to talk to Stark of his old-man fondly then things would have soured real quick. “Of course not, I will leave that to Sammy. Have fun talking with the hubby. I have work to do Stark.”   
  
Abby waited until that call ended. “How do you end up in these situations?”

Tony just sighed, looking a little morose. “I have no idea, but they’ve kidnapped my husband so I am...”   
  
“At a loss about what to do tonight?” She asked carefully. Tony was always very careful about how vulnerable he would let himself appear around others. 

“Yeah, I know one year and it’s crazy, right?” Tony tried to play it off. 

“You can always sleep at mine tonight, and then you can totally share about your wild 24 hours. I want all the deets on how you leave here yesterday, and somehow and end up smack bang in the middle of the Avengers.” 

~*~

Kate kept looking up at the Director’s office. “What is taking so long?”    
  
Tony snorted. “They’re reviewing the decisions made during the Haswari case?”    
  
“Why?” Tim didn’t understand it. The case had been closed successfully. “Haswari was arrested.”   
  
Tony wished he’d seen Haswari’s face when Sam flew up and caught him off guard. “Yeah, Mcnaive but that doesn’t mean a serious debriefing won’t take place.”

What he hadn’t said was that it was a bit more than a case briefing. He saw Gibbs just look at him with a glare - They both knew it was an interview where the new Madam Director would save her ass, or she wouldn’t. 

They’d watched as Ziva had been escorted up to the office as well not too long ago. Then, a harried-looking Vance was also called to join them. 

“That doesn’t look good.” Tim pointed out. 

Tony snorted. “You’re not wrong McObvious. Still, right now you need to finish your case notes from the case so it can be filed with JAG.”   
  
“I’m on it. You can’t have already finished yours.”   
  
Tony smirked. “It was the first thing I did this morning after my SFA paperwork. Chop Chop. Time waits for no man and I wouldn’t want to upset JAG.”   
  


_ He hoped Sam was having a better day than he was ...  _


	7. Deja-Vu

**Chapter 7: Deja-Vu**

Sam thanks to Tony’s warnings managed to pack a go-bag of clothes and grab his wings. He wasn’t planning on using them but considering he was about to go and play therapist to the Avengers. It seemed prudent. It would be better to be over-prepared than underprepared. 

Tony Stark immediately looked at him and up and down, trying to size him up. “I thought you would be taller.”

“Probably why I became a pilot,” Sam replied evenly. “So Director Fury says that I am to be your therapist ... Are we doing this in New York.”   
  
“I don’t do therapy.”   
  
“Pity,” Sam replied. “I need to convince Steve that it is okay. I am combatting period issues to mental health and it would be great to have a positive role model.”   
  
Stark snorted. “Now, I know you are talking shit.”

“About what specifically?” Sam challenged him. 

“Positive role model?”   
  
“You could be but your actions will determine that avenue,” Sam replied calmly. He knew the issues he would have to unpick here and they were long and deep, and, oh so very tangled. 

“Well, you’re his friend you should tell him.”

Sam shook his head. “No, that will fall to my Tony because if I become the therapist there needs to be a delineation in the roles.”

“Your Tony?” Stark quirked an eyebrow. “That’s oddly possessive.”   
  
Sam smirked, enjoying this conversation a hell of a lot more than he probably should. “That would be why I married him.”

“Okay that’s fair.”

~*~

Steve, was surprised by the knock at the door. He still remembered his manners stepping back. “Hi Sam, and that wasn't the Tony I was expecting to be with you.”   
  
Stark pouted. “People keep saying that and I am going to get a complex.”   
  
“I doubt it,” Steve replied lightly. 

Sam hummed already seeing what is wrong with the dynamic. “So how are you two going to lead the Avengers ... When you’re not working as a team?”    
  
“We fixed New York.” Stark replied defensively. “Then you know, I helped to rebuild it.”   
  
Sam nodded his head. “Steve before we go any further, Director Fury has asked me to step in as therapist for the Avengers.”   
  
Steve paled. “I am so sorry. You got out, I had no intention of dragging you back in.”   
  
Sam shook his head. “I stopped pararescue because my partner was killed, and I didn’t trust anyone else to watch my back and I was sick of the sand.”

The words had unwittingly struck a chord. Steve sat down, “How do you move on?”   
  
Stark flinched, seeing what Sam had said and how Steve had reacted. He’d never thought about it from that perspective. He could tell he was probably going to hate Wilson before long. “I can’t comment about World War Two ... As I didn’t live it but I probably should have spoken to someone after being captured in Afghanistan.”   
  
Steve looked up. “You were captured?”    
  
Stark sucked in a breath wanting to rant but knew he would be shouting at the wrong target. He would have an epic rant the next time Fury decided to grace him with his presence. “So you don’t know how I created Iron Man?”    
  
Rogers to his shame blushed. “No but I think I should have listened. Will you tell me now?”

_ And Stark did tell him - if only to get him to wake up to what Fury was trying to do. _

~*~

In a feeling of deja-vu, Tony was once more visited by a Dread Pirate knock off as he tried to do his paperwork. “What do you want now, Fury?”

Fury did not look amused. “Your husband broke the Avengers.”

Tony, pinched his nose because seriously? That was such a load of crap and he was so not in the mood. He had to sleep alone last night which was something he was beginning to seriously hate. “And that is my fault, how exactly?”

Fury growled right back, not liking the fact he was being challenged. “He was supposed to get them battle-ready!”

Tony was going to regret asking this but figured he may as well find out. If only so he could start a plan on how to make him miserable - if he was feeling vindictive he might enlist Abby’s help. “And what did Sam do that was terrible in your eyes?” 

“Stark and Rogers were hugging and crying when I went to visit.”

Tony didn’t just snicker because wow, that was too funny so he outright laughed in Fury’s face. “They both have PTSD and no doubt Sam made them face it. You should be ecstatic as you will have a healthy functioning boyband to throw at the world’s problems by the time Sam is done.”

Fury’s grin let Tony know he was going to hate what the guy said next. “That’s right but you know what all good boy bands need a manager and mine is managerless right now.”

“In case you forgot I work for NCIS.” Tony pointed out like it should have been obvious. 

Fury threw a badge at him, which Tony caught on reflex. “This is on the orders of Alexander Pierce you’ve just been transferred to SHIELD. You’re starting as my assistant director, be happy, DiNozzo. This is a promotion.”

Tony groaned. “I have argued with you every single time and you then choose to have me work for you?”    
  
Fury’s grin was demented. “I don’t like yes men. That is how you get dead.”

“FYI - This is not a great recruitment speech,” Tony had to point out. “I like living and I have managed to stay that way here at NCIS.” 

“Bitch please, I have read your file once you started to fraternize with Rogers.” Fury retorted. It was impressive the only one he had with such a colourful file was Coulson and everyone thought he was dead apart from his team and Maria Hill. 

“It was the plague thing, right?”    
  
Fury just shook his head. “You and Stark are going to either kill each other or take over the world.”   
  
So of course, now was when Gibbs decided to appear. “Tony, who is your friend.”   
  
“This is Director Fury of SHIELD and he has decided that I should be managing the Avengers.” Tony gave a quick summary of his morning, and Gibbs put down his coffee.

“I see.”   
  
The tension, Tony didn’t know whether he wanted to get popcorn, record this or run and hide forever. 

Fury just stood calm, and like a stone. “Is there something I can help you with Special Agent Gibbs?”    
  
“I am just wondering where you got off casually stealing my SFA,” Gibbs replied in the same, even tone. 

_ Tony didn’t know how he felt about being fought over.  _

Fury snorted. “I don’t care what you think. His transfer is approved and you can huff and puff your chest out but it is happening. The world needs a functional Avengers, you can train another team member.”   
  
Tony just looked morose. “Is Sam still in DC or is he in New York?”   
  
Fury rolled his eyes. “Your hubby is currently overseeing war stories being swapped between Stark and Rogers. I think the plan is for them to help you pack.”

Tony sent up a silent prayer for his house. “Do I get a chance to say goodbye?”   
  
Fury shrugged. “Sure, you can even braid their hair if you like but today is your last day at NCIS... If anyone wants to argue with that they can take it up with the Security Council.”   
  
His piece said, Fury, turned around and left. He didn’t see the point in an argument as nothing was going to change. Gibbs was going to learn that when it came to it - Fury had the better pull in Washington. 

_ Tony kept staring at the badge. “Boss, what the fuck just happened?”  _


	8. Set the Tone

** Chapter 8: Set the Tone **

Tony looked up at Avengers Tower, and he felt the new badge on his waist, it seemed heavier somehow. He knew his husband was already there, but he took a moment to compose himself. Tony, more than anyone, understood the importance of first impressions, and he was about to meet superheroes, so it was critical. 

"Are you ready?" Agent Hill asked him bluntly. She wasn't sure if this plan was genius, or Fury was about to multiply the craziness. She did recognise that if DiNozzo had survived the legendary Gibbs, then he would survive Tony Stark. 

Tony shrugged and answered Hill honestly. "Doesn't matter whether I am, or not."

Hill smirked, liking that reflective answer. She clapped him on the shoulder in a show of camaraderie, "You'll do great."

She moved them along to the very last elevator. "This is the Avenger's elevator that goes up to the private floors only."

"Good morning, Agent DiNozzo." 

It was a disembodied voice, but Tony found himself grinning at the coolness. Stark had built himself an AI for company, "Thank you, Mr Jarvis."

"You know who I am?"

Tony grinned up at the monitor, feeling it was only appropriate to look at who he was talking to even if they were disembodied. "You betcha, I read up on all of you the minute Director Fury assigned my husband to the initiative."

Tony got the impression that he might have shocked Jarvis. There was a pause, "I can understand reading up on the members of the Initiative, but why my program?" 

Tony tilted his head. "Did Dr Stark design you to have emotions because that sounded like doubt?"

"I don't understand the meaning of the sentence," Jarvis replied, and even Hill was now intrigued by the interaction. 

Tony frowned because from what he'd read of Stark he wasn't the type to stifle learning. "You may not have a physical body, but you are important to Dr Stark, and I needed to know if there are protocols I should adhere to?"

"No one apart from Sir has ever cared," Jarvis replied. If he were to describe his circuitry at that moment, it would be relaxed and warm. 

Tony grinned. "Well, now there are two of us."

Maria spoke up. "Three. If you ensure that I get a copy of the document, I will ensure that it is distributed to any of the SHIELD employees who need to be here."

Okay, so yeah he would be a good hire. 

~*~

"Stark!" Hill bellowed. 

A head popped out of what looked like a communal kitchen area. "WHAT!" He didn't see why he was getting yelled at in his own kitchen. 

Maria rolled her eyes, not fazed by any yelling. "Your new Agent is here?" 

"We don't need a new agent!" Stark fired back. Although he was at least heading towards them for an actual introduction. 

Tony snorted at the comment, and spoke up, figuring that they may as well start as they meant to go on. "That is the biggest lie I have ever heard, Stark, plus, you know you kidnapped my husband, so I just had to get in on the act."

Stark's face lit up with joy realising it would be DiNozzo. "Well, well. Look what the cat dragged in, I am calling you DiNozzo or is it DiNozzo-Wilson."

Tony was used to snark, and he could wield it just as effectively. "I told you to look after Sam. Where is he?" 

"Flying around to annoy Hawkeye I think," as if that explained anything. 

Hill looked at him too, and Tony just sighed. "You know I hate the fact that makes sense. Jarvis, could you tell my husband that he better fly his ass to me, and say hello. Or, you know he can sleep on the couch forever."

Stark was surprised by the warm response from his AI. "Your message has been relayed, Agent DiNozzo."

"Thank you, Jarvis."

Stark was conflicted because he loved the fact there was someone who didn't just consider Jarvis to be an electronic butler, and at the same time, he was jealous. "You already making friends with my boy?" 

Tony smirked. "Wouldn't you be friends with the person keeping you safe in the building?"

Stark had no answer about it but instead chose to address his creation. "Just remember, I'm the Tony who created you, J."

"Can I not have friends, Sir?" The AI asked innocently. 

Maria desperately wished she had the foresight to record Stark's facial impressions. She did feel though that now was the perfect time to leave. "You know what, DiNozzo? I think you are going to be just fine and I am going back to DC." and to  _ sanity  _ was left unsaid.

~*~

Just as Jarvis had explained, Sam was in the battle room, weaving in out of arrows being shot. He didn't expect a therapy session to work this way, but hey, he was adaptable. 

"Quit moving!" Hawkeye was complaining. 

He wasn't expecting the new therapist to be a combat pilot, but he should have known considering it was Shield. He'd assumed he'd be able to land every hit, but so far he was averaging about fifteen percent.

Sam chuckled because that wasn't how real life worked. He didn't see why he should make it easy on the sharpshooter. "Now, why would I do that?"

Jarvis was the one to interrupt their fun. "Mr Wilson, your husband, has requested your presence on the communal level."

Sam immediately landed on the floor in shock. He looked upwards much like Tony had at the ceiling to address Jarvis. "He is here?" 

"Yes, and I was to inform you that if you failed to greet him, you would be sleeping on the couch forever."

Hawkeye was laughing his ass off, "Nice to see something can disrupt your cool."

"Hey, this is not funny."

Hawkeye smirked, "From my point of view, it is. Come on, as I want to meet the other Mr Wilson."

Sam groaned. "No, do not call him that he is still annoyed that I brought Steve home because he looked like a sad puppy."

Hawkeye looked askance. "Did you just call Captain America a sad puppy?" 

Sam shook his head. "No, Tony, my Tony, called him a golden retriever."

Hawkeye snickered in disbelief. "I think he will be okay. You shouldn't worry too much about him."

~*~

Stark was still trying to gain the measure of the man opposite him. He knew the power of a good suit, and DiNozzo didn't look like Coulson, which was a good thing. He was intrigued to see how Wilson and DiNozzo interact. He would get his chance now as Wilson was slinking up to their little group. 

Stark smirked, "Wilson, apparently your Sam DiNozzo right now."

Sam shrugged, knowing not to make war in his own marriage bed. "I will take that." Wilson barely gave Stark a second glance as his eyes were all on Tony. He kept staring at the badge on DiNozzo's waist. "Since when did you work for SHIELD?" 

Tony shrugged, "Since you ran away from DC."

Sam snorted because it was so not his fault. He wasn't going to take the blame, "I got kidnapped by Fury."

"That is funny. I got kidnapped too!" Tony replied. "So Stark, I am Anthony DiNozzo or Wilson, depending on who rescued who last." 

Stark took the offered hand and asked a question that had been bugging him. "Are you the one who got Steve to think for himself?" 

Tony smirked. "I wouldn't go that far. I just pointed out that sometimes people have an ulterior motive."

"And what are your ulterior motives?" 

Tony wasn't surprised by the question. He wouldn't need to be an expert to know Stark would have justifiable trust issues. "Let's see. I plan to keep Sam alive and healthy. Make sure the team is safe and effective so that you can help with my first aim, and just maybe we can do some good around the planet."

"Just like that?" Stark replied, sass evident in his voice. 

Tony shrugged. "For me, yeah, it's that simple."

Stark smirked. "I will be glad for the help because I have been trying, but it is no easy task."

Tony smiled. "Well, now you have help, but that means you need to accept help too. You know to be a good role model for how times have changed for Rogers."

Stark scowled. "I take it back. You are a terrible person."

Tony smirked, "And funnily enough, Ms Potts was ecstatic to hear of your mature response."

"You sneaky son of a bitch."

Tony put a hand around Sam's waist and pulled him close. "Oh Stark, I am only just beginning."


	9. No Play Dates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony does not like Steve's new potential playmates and grounds him.

Tony and Sam had managed to settle into the Avenger's tower. Tony was relieved that Stark had gifted the couple a floor for their personal use. It was remarkable insight from the genius because they all had work areas on the communal level, but their personal spaces were just that - private. 

Tony was lying in bed luxuriating in sleeping in on a Sunday morning, and Sam sleeping on top of him. He was content to stay like this for as long as possible - Today was a good day. 

He should have known better than to think it - He would get better at not jinxing himself.

"Agent DiNozzo, I thought you should be made aware of Fury's communication made this morning to Captain America."

Well, he was wide awake and not for fun reasons like had been fantasising about only moments before. "Talk to me, Jarvis."

"I have taken the liberty of ordering you a hazelnut latte to be prepared." The AI explained before he started to give his verbal report. 

Tony whimpered because it was confirmed - there went his lazy Sunday. He pushed Sam off him, "Let me up."

Sam grumbled into his chest. He was like a koala bear in his sleep, "It is too early."

Tony rolled his eyes. "Yeah but Fury is being a meddling pirate so clearly I need to get up and have a little chat with him."

The tone suggested it wasn't going to be something that Fury would enjoy.

"Go and get them, tiger," Sam offered, which would have felt more supportive if he hadn't fallen back asleep. Tony wanted to grumble and wake him up, but it felt petty, besides he could get his revenge later. He had his own mission this morning to keep his team together. 

~*~

Steve stormed into Tony's office space before he'd even finished the drink Jarvis had ordered on his behalf. "Why have you denied me joining the STRIKE team?"

Tony looked up from his report and didn't react to the aggressive tone. "They are not the Avenger's team, so let me ask you this ... Why should you be used?"

Steve frowned because it should be obvious, "It is tactically dicey, and I can help reduce casualties."

Tony acknowledged the point as it was a fair one, and he wouldn't deny the truth of it. "True, but were you given the serum and told to be cannon fodder?" 

"No, of course not!" Steve recoiled at the suggestion.

Tony smirked because he wasn't like the others; Steve's mask didn't fool him. "Oh good because otherwise, I was going to have Sam discuss your apparent deathwish." 

Steve scowled, and almost churlishly added, "It is not like I offer other skills."

Tony sighed because Fury needs his ass-kicking so badly. He was sure he could arrange something somehow. Tony was creative. He could manage it if he put his mind to it. "If you lack skills, then ask for the material to educate yourself. Stark has already promised to fund anything you want to catch up."

"I don't want to catch up." Steve hissed back because everyone kept talking about catching up and he didn't even want to be in this time. 

Tony dearly wished that Sam was having this conversation because the couple had agreed on the fact this meltdown needed to happen. It was just Sam was more tactful than Tony on any day of the week. "You know what? I am sorry, so sorry that Fury's fucked up suspicious nature had your ass dragged out of your long sleep, but I can't fix that problem. You're awake, Steve, and no genie can stuff you back in the ice tin can. You're here. You are in this world, and you do have a choice."

"What choice?" It was clear that Steve thought it was a fool's choice. 

"How you choose to live in it. You made the ultimate sacrifice seventy years ago, and now you've been dragged back into the land of the living. You can fight and scream and refuse to seek help, but if that is the case, I will be benching you from the team." Tony finished letting his own natural authority come to the fore because it was the only way to handle a character like Steve. 

"Why?" Steve sounded bewildered and almost betrayed, not able to reconcile Tony, the guy who'd made him dinner, and this Tony, the team's leader.

Tony sighed because Fury was the sneakiest, stupidest son of a bitch and needed all the karma to hit him at once and preferably with extreme prejudice. "You hate modern technology which means while you have admirable strengths in the field, you are a liability."

"I thought you were a friend."

Tony rolled his eyes because Steve was too old to be pouting at him. "It is because I am your friend that I am giving you this reality check. You were close to Agent Carter, is that correct?"

"Yeah, she is one hell of a spitfire," Steve replied with a smile full of reminiscing nostalgia.

Tony smirked, "And what would she say to you right now?"

Steve slumped in defeat, "She would tell me to get over my tantrum, put on my best face and get one with business because it needed to be done."

Tony wanted to kiss her, "She is correct, so will you work with Jarvis to get you the answers, and bring you up to speed? The main thing in all this is I don't want your ignorance of the modern world to be a weapon used against you."

Steve grimaced realising what type of exploitation he'd left himself vulnerable to due to his stubbornness, "Bucky would be next in line to kick my ass."

Tony had done the battering through the defensive shields and now offered some sweetness to balance it. "You're not the only one in store for some tough love. You just happened to be gracious enough to come to me first."

Steve looked up at the ceiling. "Are you willing to help me with my homework, Jarvis?" 

"I would be delighted, Mr Rogers."

Steve didn't know it, but by even asking the AI, he was taking steps to live in the world. 

~*~

Tony had managed to have a vaguely peaceful lunch considering his early run-in with the Cap. Sam sat next to him, and they were making up their sandwiches without saying a word. 

"Well, that is disgustingly coupley," Stark remarked, entering the communal kitchen. 

"Perks of being married, Stark," Sam remarked, all too smug but he figured he could be in this situation. Whatever reason they chose to get married, they decided to stay married and had worked on something incredible. 

Stark nodded his head, conceding the point and joined the pair at the table choosing only to drink coffee. In his opinion, coffee was a food group, and he was a genius, so no one would be able to dissuade him. "So Spangles was upset with you this morning. He punched out his bag extra hard after your chat."

Tony smirked, hearing the question not being asked. "I told him he couldn't go and play with his STRIKE friends as it would be cheating on the Avengers."

Stark snickered because that was just too funny. "Ohh Fury is not going to like that you know."

Tony shrugged his shoulders, showing how little that idea bothered him, "What Fury wants isn't my problem. I was happy with NCIS once I met Sam."

"Ah, love you too, Boo," Sam replied with a cheesy grin. It said something about his charms that he could get away with such a line. It seemed like their peace was not at an end with their next angry person incoming, at least they had managed to finish their lunch. 

Natasha stormed in, slamming her hands on the desk. "We needed Rogers."

Tony frowned and looked at Stark, "Fury did make me the handler for the team, right?"

Stark grinned, as he was still not over the whole  _ Nastashalie _ affair. "Yep and he made you an assistant director to boot."

Tony smirked, "I was proud of that fact. Well, if I am honest, it was because I know it would wind up my ex-colleagues."

"Well, you're with the cool kids now," Stark reassured him. "Plus you seem to delight in making Fury miserable, so that means we're friends for life."

Natasha sneered at their handler. "You are messing with things you don't understand."

Tony laughed in her face. "Oh, Agent Romanov, I am a married man. You have no avenue to exploit with me, and I will run the Avengers my way, so either you are with the team and aiming to do some good in the world, or you can go back to Fury and be his lapdog."

Tony hadn't given an inch to the Black Widow. He had shown no fear or physical reaction to her beauty. She had no weapon to manipulate him, and she too had come to that realisation. He wasn't above targeting her own weaknesses though if she was going to pull these stunts.

"I am no one's lapdog." She insisted, her proudness more than evident on her face.

Tony nodded calmly, "Glad we have an understanding then Agent Romanov."

She stormed off, and the three men watched it happen. Tony just sipped his coffee but shared his musings. "I wonder how many more conversations like that I am going to have before the close of pay."

Stark spoke up, "Jarvis, my main man. If Fury graces us with his presence, you better record it from multiple angles."

"Sir, you didn't need to ask," came the slightly huffy response from his AI,

Sam chuckled, looking at his husband he couldn't help but remark. "You would have thought they would have read your background."

Tony sneered, "My superiors have only ever seen what I wanted them to see. You're part of this boyband, so you are going to get everything you need. I am going to make sure you win any contest."

Tony Stark was suddenly thrilled for Sam to be on the team. The man might not be the richest of them or have any superpowers, but Stark suspected he might be one of the best things on this Earth right now. 


End file.
